"How hard can it be?"
These are famous last words. It became the motto of the Top Gear lads in the early 2000s when they attempted something outlandish and, quite frankly, silly.
So when some mates and I decided we wanted to take up a new sport, and after a few lemonades and a long lunch settled on curling, we uttered those famous words.
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With dreams of Olympics in our sights, and less than two years to achieve our goal, Boyd, Cormac, Matt, Nick and a few other fellas joined me at Boondall Iceworld in Brisbane's north for a 'Come and Try Curling' evening. Forty-something dads, and a young physio to help keep them together; how hard can it be?
We started where everyone starts: wobbly knees, cold toes, and a healthy dose of humility. We spent those early days just trying to master the mechanics—the slide, the release, the way the ice "takes" the stone.
There is a deceptive complexity to curling. People see it on TV once every four years and think it's just shuffleboard on ice. But when you're out there, you realise it's a game of millimetres. It's "chess on ice," but the chess pieces weigh 20 kilograms and the board is 45 metres away and constantly changing under your feet.
We leaned into that challenge.
Our first competition run by the Queensland Curling Association (QCA), we entered as the 'Curlews'. We made it all the way to the final, and after settling for a draw, had to come back a fortnight later and replay the final for the first time in QCA history. We lost that night, but it gave us the confidence to nominate for the National Championships.
It's no surprise that curling in Australia is niche, and thus there is no dedicated curling ice in the country. All Australian curlers have to play and practice on multi-purpose ice. Ice hockey players, figure skaters, and recreational ice skaters take priority in most rinks across the country. The only Olympic standard curling ice in the southern hemisphere is in Naseby, New Zealand – a small country town about two hours out of Queenstown. So this is where Curling Australia holds their Nationals and has done for over a decade.
A trip to NZ for our team didn't come cheap, so we put the feelers out for sponsors, and were lucky enough to have wonderful supporters in the Maynard family, of the Maynard Cattle Company. Geoff and Alison and their family donated the Curlews three cows, and we sold them to fund our trip, and invest in our brooms, shoes, and all the other tools of the trade.
Watch the Winter Olympic Games Milano Cortina 2026 live and free on Channel 9 and 9Now. Plus, every event live & on demand, every medal in 4K, and exclusive international coverage on Stan Sport.
In May 2025, the Curlews made the pilgrimage across to New Zealand, and it was there that we were given a healthy dose of reality.
Essentially we'd been playing backyard cricket on our driveway, and were now playing on the SCG. The difference in the ice was chalk and cheese.
We were so incredibly fortunate that the curling community is so friendly and welcoming. Every team and player that we came across in the round robin tournament would help us with a piece of wisdom here and there. Picking the right lines. Sweeping technique. Controlling weight. Competition was happening concurrently on the sheets next to ours, so there would be the odd tip and word of encouragement from the more experienced teams. It was truly humbling, and uplifting.
Rugby commentary being my day job, I naturally jumped on the chance to take the mic for the live stream when we weren't playing. Calling matches with national coach Perry Marshall was invaluable in our education. Being able to swap notes with Hugh Millikin, the godfather of Australian curling, and get feedback from numerous Aussie representatives gave us confidence every stone that was thrown.
One of the real highlights was being able to meet the mixed doubles duo who fly the flag internationally for Aussie curling. Tahli Gill and Dean Hewitt are currently ranked number one in the world for mixed doubles. In a cruel twist of fate, they didn't qualify for Milano Cortina 2026. A heartbreaking sudden death playoff that didn't go to plan meant they missed out on a spot.
The fact that Tahli and Dean are the top ranked team in the world, representing a country that doesn't have curling ice is remarkable. It's the equivalent of 'Eric the Eel' being the world number one 50m freestyler. Dedicated curling ice in Australia is and remains a huge priority for the sport, and we hope their story can help spread the word. Despite not securing an Olympic berth, they will be heading to the World Championships later this year, and shooting for gold. They have been so welcoming, and forthcoming with their wisdom over the past year, and we are behind them every step of the way.
Our Milano Cortina 2026 dreams ended at the 2025 Nationals with a sixth place finish, however it lit a flame for us that burns very brightly. Our love for this sport grows every time we hit the ice. Whilst the Olympics is our ultimate goal, we have found spreading the curling gospel as fulfilling, and we encourage everyone who can to try it out. The French Alps 2030 Winter Olympic Games are now in our sights.
In February across Western Australia, Queensland and Victoria, the Curling associations are holding 'come and try' sessions, and anyone in those states who wants to give it a go definitely should. It's how the Curlews started, and the more people playing the sport, the better the competition.
The Curlews (Boyd, Cormac, Matt, Nick and myself) have found a whole new love for sports and competition in curling. The most difficult part was actually turning up the first night. Everything since has been a wild ride, and we've loved every minute of it. So get off your backsides and have a crack. How hard can it be?
Andrew Swain will be calling the curling for Channel 9 and 9Now as part of the coverage of Winter Olympic Games Milano Cortina 2026. Tune in as the coverage begins with 'Let the Games Begin' at 9.15pm (AEDT) tonight.
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